Thanks for the responses.
I am a picky, I admit

I too have heard VWs are plagued with problems. I do like a lot of things about the Insight - the dashboard and hvac controls look very nice and work well. I just wish the lower part was dark like the upper part. I like getting upper 30s-40s in fuel economy. And I with econ off and not trying to keep speedometer in green and driving normally, it actually does have normal power. I actually think the exterior looks goo too. So maybe *black* leather clazio covers would make me happy...
But that high pitch noise may be the deal breaker for me. I do think it's an issue of age, that the mechanics were just too old to hear the sound. I work with teenagers, and my clients hear it. You're right, the key is to identify where it's coming from and how to replicate it. So maybe I'll make a project of it with some young friends to see what we can do.
The fact that the other Insight we test drove did NOT have the sound makes me think that cetainly something needs tweaking or tightening in my car.
Are there any cheap audio devices that could detect the sound for me?